So yesterday we met the jeweler - David West Nytch of West and Company (there is link to his blog at the bottom of the page). He was great! David sat with us for over an hour and explained about diamonds and about the custom design process, answered all of our questions (and the ones I called back with a couple hours later...) and looked at pictures of rings that I liked that I had found on the internet. There was not a single point where I felt pressured to try on rings, to buy something, to commit to something right then or to spend more than the (relatively small) budget we had presented to him. I was also really happy with the courtesy and respect he showed us. (As an aside - The Beau bought me a beautiful necklace for the holidays last year and went into a number of jewelry stores where he was made to feel very unwelcome and unimportant because he clearly did not have buckets of money to spend, so I think this was a nice change for him.) David did not show us a single ring and the only reason I tried any on was because he had some that I had seen online and kind of liked and I wanted to try them on. Overall, I was impressed with the store, the quality of the merchandise I saw there and David's attitude. It was a really weird feeling being in a jewelry store and not being on the defensive.
My taste in rings is a little off the beaten path - I want an emerald or oval cut stone (most likely emerald) and I like simple, clean, elegant designs. Here is an example of a ring I like from Tiffany's, though I definitely don't like the price...
I maybe completely off here, but I got the impression that David is particularly interested in creating a ring for me because he rarely gets requests for emerald or oval cut stones - he doesn't even normally keep any in stock! I knew that they were definitely less popular than round or princess cuts, but I guess because Tiffany's advertises both emerald and oval rings I thought they were a little more mainstream than they actually are.So here is my uncertainty... After the excitement of actually going ring shopping wore off I started second guessing our budget. We set the budget about 6 month ago when we first started more seriously talking about getting engaged, and it seemed reasonable and a relatively small amount when considering diamond rings. But since then there have been some expected (moving) and unexpected expenses (car repairs, owing money to the IRS instead of getting money back, economic meltdown) and there is less money in the bank and I just feel guilty spending all that money on one thing. Even though it is one thing that I really want, that will most likely be made specially for me and that I anticipate having the rest of my life... I'm generally quite indecisive (deciding on a restaurant to go to dinner can often be a difficult decision, let alone what to order) and only gets worse when its about spending lots of money - money that we don't necessarily have and that we may need for more important things.
The Beau is also insisting on paying for the entire thing himself, which I both like and dislike. I like it because its such a nice gesture and I know he wants to do this really great thing for me. I dislike it because I'm a feminist. I'm a modern independent gal - I didn't wait around for The Beau to propose to me. We are a couple, we make decisions as couple and decided to progress to the next step in our relationship as a couple and if I want an engagement ring we should purchase it as a couple. Also, I dislike the idea that I've been "bought" or "claimed" with a ring. I also dislike that I will be wearing a very obvious symbol of our relationship while he will not be until after the marriage. I am seriously considering getting him an engagement ring to go with mine. This ring would probably become his wedding band when the time arrived.
WOW! Longest post yet. Surprisingly, I feel a little better now. Maybe I can flat out ask David what the minimum amount we can spend and make a ring with a quality stone (I don't need or even want a large stone)? I wonder what his answer would be? If I ask, I'll post the answer.
